Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Hugs not Bugs.

I saw a giant bug in my kitchen on Monday night. It might have been a roach. I am a clean person. cleanish. 

It scurried out from underneath my fridge (no one cleans under there). I wasn't scared. I was startled. I am not scared of bugs. Snakes, very much so. The bug ran out and parked himself against the cabinet; it was trapped between me and the wall. Instead of killing the bug, I thought "this is why I have a cat!" I picked up my cat who was conveniently laying in the kitchen window sill and used my cat as a laser pointer and pointed at the bug.  Cooper would not look at the bug. I aimed him more at the bug, "See it!" I told my cat. Cooper flopped his head to the other side, annoyed at my grip on his ribcage and the lack of floor beneath is hovering paws. "Get it!" I commanded. And the bug retreated beneath the fridge. So much for the cat. I rationalized that Cooper would be a better predator if it was a mammal, then he could smell the hot blood. Do insects have hot blood? Is my cat a vampire? He spends a lot of time in the sun. And really likes BBQ potato chips, do vampires like BBQ potato chips? I think so.

So there was a bug. So I cleaned my already(sort of) clean floor and Googled how to get rid of bugs (roaches). Borax will do it! I love Borax! Borax will also hurt my cat. I also love my cat. At least, I think it's love he moved in with me in May, so I guess we are still in the honeymoon period. He always greets me at the door, once in a while he doesn't greet me at the door. Is that the beginning of the end?

Baking soda mixed with powdered sugar will kill the bugs! I felt so diabolical as I mixed one white powder with another. Then I threw the white powder all around my fridge, like a salt circle to ward off witches, or an isolated Frigidaire snow shower. Eat the powder bug! It's not a trap.

I think I might rearrange the powder in straight lines on mirror. Just so the bug thinks its illegal to eat and therefore more desirable. 

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