Three, two, Pier One

I forgot how much I love Pier One! I haven't been to the store in years and then went for a work scouting trip and fell in love all over again! And they were having their 50% off sale and I love everything in there. I need to live in a Pier One, my dream is to be covered in weirdly tooled bar stools and over-embellished accent pillows. I had to stop by yesterday on my way back home after the wedding to buy the soaps that I resisted buying on the work event. I bought 7 soups for $6! Awesome! One is chocolate and pepper! It makes me so happy to use, Especaily since someone used my shampoo bar as regular soap and I got annoyed. But the chocolate cayenne makes me happy.

Exercise. Just because my heart is broken, doesn't mean it has to stop working.

Internet, tell me a white lie

Dear Internet,   The Internet just informed me that my epic High School/Grade school/Beyond crush was married in January. He is married. This really affects me. Why? I don't know. I guess I always thought of him as a safe fantasy. But now he is married. I felt this way when Miss Eternal-Bags-Under-Her-Eyes took him to the prom. Why does the Internet know everything? Not that I ever really talked to this guy other than stammering self-consciously in 11th grade English class during an assignment about what would one need on a desert island. I said a swimming pool. I also remember having the fly on my black corduroy pants be down next to him during a movie in 10th grade and trying to figure out a subtle way to zip my fly back up, realizing now he wasn't ever looking at me and I could have just zipped it up and no one would have ever know but now I am telling the internet. I feel like I just missed some sort of deadline, like had I Googled him earlier, he would never have gotten married and could stay forever in my head as the guy I totally could have been with if I really wanted to. But he is married. I never would have guessed it. But I should have figured it out I have excellent taste. But I am a little bit vulnerable since I am coming off the best friend's wedding thing where I was the most attractive and least married of all the bridesmaids and the only person that wanted to dance with me was the gay friend of the groom. I just wanted some Internet comfort food, some gazing at my untouchable crush and then he goes and gets married. Who am I to pine for now?   This is worse than my apartment manager thinking I have morning sickness when really I am doubled over from the lactose in the Caribou Coffee chai tea.

Stop it.

Stop typing symptoms into the internet, no good will come of that. Do not click on any of those inticing yahoo.about answers to your questionable pain. You have already taken ibuprofen no need to complicate it will Google fears. Keep eating your fruit bar, blame it on staying up later, drinking too much caffeine and not eating enough of anything. Stop it. Google is not an oracle. Google doesn't have all the answers. yet.

Mystical Creatures

I really like sea serpents. I think they exist. I have dreams about them. I just recently watched a DVD of Monster Hunters and I really enjoyed Watching the Sea Serpent Searchers. I was not are enjoying the Cubacara information or the Jersey Devil info. I think it is that the Sea Serpent is more biological and easily to explain and find. The other two are more alien and other realm-ly and the proof of their existence opens a whole new level of realization and that is new and unfamiliar.

But I like Sea Serpents.

woo t?

Woot.

Where did that come from?

Woot-a joyful sound, like hooray, but a word.

I had never heard "woot" until about a year ago. Is it from somewhere? Is it new? I always thought it was the word "woo."
Woo-derived from woo-hoo a celebratory cry.

Like, "Woooooooooo!" we won the Superbowl, or something like that. Now I hear woot. And not from an isolate group but across all people I meet. Have people always been saying 'woot?' Did I just never hear the 't' and the end? I even see it typed. Is is recent as I have been noticing? Or is an ancient word of expressed delight?

Why had I never heard before last year? Now it surrounds me. Is it from some TV or movie? Or has it always been woot?

Has it always been woot?

?

Morning Aliments

Why does my ear hurt? I just woke up, I couldn't have done something to it in the 15 minutes I have been awake. How does packing chicken salad for lunch hurt my ear? Or making weak single cups of Powerade? Why does my ear hurt.

Is that a spider bite on my leg? Did a five-fanged spider bite my side-upper calf? Was it a tarantula? A huge sneaky tarantula? Shouldn't it itch? It doesn't itch. Where are my super powers?

My gum hurts. I flossed why does it hurt? It feels like it is sandwiches between my molars, like fingers in a door. I flossed, what more does it need? Poking? Does it need poking? More floss? Does it want more floss?